Money Matters 326-Navigating Caregiving Challenges with Isabel Melgarejo

Isabel Melgarejo: Money Matters Podcast Interview

December 20, 2024 . 11:55 AM . ID: 375475781

Transcript

00:02 - 00:07
Christopher Hensley, RICP®
Welcome to Money Matters with Christopher Hensley.

00:08 - 00:13
Christopher Hensley, RICP®
Today, we're joined by a remarkable guest, Isabel Mulgueroa and I don't know if I'm saying that correctly.

00:13 - 00:17
Christopher Hensley, RICP®
Can you say that for me so I don't slaughter your last name here?

00:18 - 00:19
Isabel MNelgarejo
That would be Mulgueroa.

00:20 - 00:21
Isabel MNelgarejo
Okay.

00:22 - 00:23
Christopher Hensley, RICP®
I'm just going to start.

00:24 - 00:26
Christopher Hensley, RICP®
This conference will now be recorded.

00:28 - 00:30
Christopher Hensley, RICP®
Good afternoon and welcome to Money Matters.

00:30 - 00:31
Christopher Hensley, RICP®
I'm Chris Hensley.

00:31 - 00:34
Christopher Hensley, RICP®
We have a fantastic guest for you today.

00:34 - 00:36
Christopher Hensley, RICP®
We've got Isabel Melgaro.

00:36 - 00:38
Christopher Hensley, RICP®
I hope I'm saying it correctly there.

00:38 - 00:46
Christopher Hensley, RICP®
And you are a caregiving planner whose personal experiences and professional expertise have driven your mission to support family caregivers.

00:47 - 00:57
Christopher Hensley, RICP®
After navigating the challenges of caregiving in your own life, Isabel designed a program to help others find balance, connection, and strength during difficult times.

00:58 - 01:06
Christopher Hensley, RICP®
She's also the host of Time to Care, the Caregiver podcast, which she shares insights and practical advice for those on their caregiving journeys.

01:07 - 01:15
Christopher Hensley, RICP®
Get ready to be inspired as we dive deep into Isabel's story and her strategies for navigating life's toughest seasons with resilience and grace.

01:15 - 01:17
Christopher Hensley, RICP®
Isabel, welcome to the show.

01:18 - 01:20
Isabel MNelgarejo
Thank you so much for having me here, Christopher.

01:21 - 01:23
Christopher Hensley, RICP®
Absolutely, well, we're super excited to have you here.

01:23 - 01:32
Christopher Hensley, RICP®
I was on your podcast on Wednesday, so I think of this as almost a continuation of that conversation, but we're switching the microphone around here.

01:32 - 01:41
Christopher Hensley, RICP®
So for listeners who may not be familiar with you, can you tell us a little bit about yourself that some that they may not know?

01:43 - 01:52
Isabel MNelgarejo
So I work with family caregivers, aka people that are taking care of their parents, a spouse, or an older child.

01:53 - 02:18
Isabel MNelgarejo
And I take them from feeling overwhelmed, not knowing where to find resources, not knowing what to do or where to start, to feeling empowered and knowing exactly what to do, having a very strong self-care routine that prioritizes their care so they can keep providing for their loved ones.

02:19 - 02:20
Christopher Hensley, RICP®
I love it, I love it.

02:20 - 02:34
Christopher Hensley, RICP®
And now your actual personal journey has kind of shaped this, can you share how your personal journey has helped you with, you know, spreading that passion to supporting other caregivers?

02:35 - 02:36
Isabel MNelgarejo
Of course.

02:36 - 02:43
Isabel MNelgarejo
So I first became a family caregiver when I was 20 years old.

02:43 - 02:51
Isabel MNelgarejo
And my dad passed away suddenly, which was unexpected, not planned.

02:52 - 03:00
Isabel MNelgarejo
And that, independently of the grief, That put my mom in a very stressful situation.

03:00 - 03:03
Isabel MNelgarejo
She was very depressed in the process.

03:03 - 03:05
Isabel MNelgarejo
She lost a house.

03:07 - 03:11
Isabel MNelgarejo
And I was just trying to make sure that we were both eating.

03:11 - 03:13
Isabel MNelgarejo
I was still living with my parents back then.

03:14 - 03:25
Isabel MNelgarejo
I was just trying to make sure that there was food on the table, that we were getting, like just life, that the bills were getting paid.

03:25 - 03:28
Isabel MNelgarejo
And just trying to get that over with.

03:28 - 03:31
Isabel MNelgarejo
It never occurred to me to ask for help.

03:31 - 03:37
Isabel MNelgarejo
It never occurred to me to outsource or involve others in the journey.

03:38 - 03:52
Isabel MNelgarejo
And five years ago, I moved away from Mexico City to Fort Worth, and I started noticing that my mom would start asking me for support and help in things that I couldn't help anymore.

03:52 - 03:57
Isabel MNelgarejo
She would call me and she would ask me like hey, how do I my Netflix got disconnected?

03:57 - 04:01
Isabel MNelgarejo
I was like I can't help you if I can't see your TV.

04:01 - 04:43
Isabel MNelgarejo
How am I supposed to help you and that was a very eye-opening time for me and I realized that if I didn't start building a community of care if I didn't start involving my other blinks and if I didn't have a plan there would be a time in which her needs were real and by real like not having Netflix probably it is a real situation but it's not an urgent one so there would be a time in which she would actually need urgent help for whatever reason and there would be and not nobody for her.

04:44 - 05:02
Isabel MNelgarejo
So I started looking around, I started talking with people and my project management brain came to life and I started developing a program for myself that would help me help my mom do whatever she wanted to do.

05:04 - 05:05
Christopher Hensley, RICP®
That makes sense, I love that.

05:06 - 05:19
Christopher Hensley, RICP®
You gave us some real life examples here where your dad passes and you had never thought when it did come time for you to help, you had never thought about asking for help or outsourcing before.

05:20 - 05:23
Christopher Hensley, RICP®
And then you gave us these examples, these real life examples.

05:23 - 05:27
Christopher Hensley, RICP®
I kind of chuckled when you said Netflix, because I think that's a common one with everybody, right?

05:29 - 05:31
Christopher Hensley, RICP®
The age is, it's not VCR anymore.

05:31 - 05:34
Christopher Hensley, RICP®
My VCR is not working, but whatever it is, right?

05:34 - 05:35
Christopher Hensley, RICP®
We need some help there.

05:35 - 05:42
Christopher Hensley, RICP®
So you made a distinction though between a real problem or an urgent problem?

05:42 - 05:46
Christopher Hensley, RICP®
It's possible that the Netflix problem is a real problem, but is it an urgent problem?

05:47 - 05:49
Christopher Hensley, RICP®
And so this is a different way that you're thinking about it.

05:49 - 05:58
Christopher Hensley, RICP®
And you want as far as even using that project management skillset that you have for creating this skeleton or this kind of.

06:00 - 06:06
Christopher Hensley, RICP®
System in place for caregivers to really get support and kind of look at those best practices.

06:06 - 06:12
Christopher Hensley, RICP®
Let's dive a little bit deeper into that and talk about caregiving challenges and solutions.

06:12 - 06:19
Christopher Hensley, RICP®
What are some of the most common challenges family caregivers face and how does your program address these challenges?

06:20 - 06:25
Isabel MNelgarejo
I think it's different from person to person.

06:26 - 06:30
Isabel MNelgarejo
For a lot of people, the financial burden, it is a real.

06:30 - 06:30
Isabel MNelgarejo
Thing.

06:31 - 06:37
Isabel MNelgarejo
There are a lot of caregivers that need to quit their jobs to care for their loved ones.

06:37 - 06:45
Isabel MNelgarejo
There's a lot of caregivers that worry about money running out before their loved ones pass.

06:45 - 06:48
Isabel MNelgarejo
So I think money, and you're really good.

06:48 - 06:55
Isabel MNelgarejo
You have amazing resources on your website and on your podcast that anybody can access to them.

06:55 - 07:00
Isabel MNelgarejo
So I think that is one problem that a lot of people face.

07:02 - 07:05
Isabel MNelgarejo
Other common issues are communication.

07:07 - 07:13
Isabel MNelgarejo
We are, as a society, I think we have a lot of taboos around many subjects.

07:14 - 07:16
Isabel MNelgarejo
We are afraid about talking about death.

07:17 - 07:28
Isabel MNelgarejo
We are afraid of talking about being sick or growing old, and we think that if we start talking about those things, we're going to invoke them and make them our reality.

07:28 - 08:06
Isabel MNelgarejo
And instead of just being aware that that happens and it can be a reality and making sure that we are consistently taking care of those things that could happen instead we just show them away and never talk about them so that's a huge problem because when things happen we don't know what to do when we're facing that situation when we need to make a decision between plugging the cord from the oxygen and all these tubes that are into our loved ones.

08:06 - 08:12
Isabel MNelgarejo
Is that something that they wanted or are we making a decision based on ourselves?

08:12 - 08:16
Isabel MNelgarejo
And because we never had that conversation, we don't know.

08:17 - 08:27
Isabel MNelgarejo
So that is another common topic that goes and something else that happens very often is that all the responsibility falls in one person.

08:27 - 08:36
Isabel MNelgarejo
I know you're an only child so you're expected to take a responsibility of all of it but the truth is that you can't outsource.

08:37 - 08:46
Isabel MNelgarejo
You can ask for support from other friends and family that are close to your parents but we don't do that.

08:46 - 08:50
Isabel MNelgarejo
We don't invite other people in that part of the journey.

08:51 - 09:23
Isabel MNelgarejo
So that is another very common mistake that or not mistake I think it's just assuming that you have to be responsible for all the care and we are afraid of inviting others and accepting how others solve problems so if you want clean laundry there is a lot of ways in which you can have it you can hire someone to clean it you can go to to a cleaners.

09:24 - 09:34
Isabel MNelgarejo
You can wash it at home, or you can buy new clothes, there's a lot of ways to have clean clothes every day.

09:35 - 09:38
Isabel MNelgarejo
And everybody's gonna see that problem in a different way.

09:39 - 09:40
Isabel MNelgarejo
So same happens with caregiving.

09:41 - 09:49
Isabel MNelgarejo
There is a lot of ways of serving and having and solving a problem.

09:51 - 09:51
Christopher Hensley, RICP®
I love it.

09:52 - 09:52
Christopher Hensley, RICP®
I love it.

09:52 - 09:54
Christopher Hensley, RICP®
So a lot to unpack there.

09:55 - 09:57
Christopher Hensley, RICP®
Uh, we, we started with the challenges, right?

09:57 - 10:02
Christopher Hensley, RICP®
Just the idea of, you know, some people worry about, do I have to quit my job to be a caregiver?

10:02 - 10:05
Christopher Hensley, RICP®
And you think about the financial implications of that.

10:05 - 10:06
Christopher Hensley, RICP®
So that's a heavy, big decision, right?

10:07 - 10:10
Christopher Hensley, RICP®
Or just that worry of money running out was something that you mentioned there.

10:10 - 10:12
Christopher Hensley, RICP®
That's also weighing on people.

10:12 - 10:21
Christopher Hensley, RICP®
You talked about taboos and really the idea of talking about death and growing old and just people being afraid that if you talk about it, you're invoking it, right?

10:21 - 10:37
Christopher Hensley, RICP®
So that's not we're talking about having these real life difficult conversations, even mentioned that, you know, the idea of whether to put somebody on life support or not those end of life discussions and you advocated for us having those discussions with with family members.

10:38 - 10:42
Christopher Hensley, RICP®
Let's keep talk, let's keep diving into that or talking about that.

10:42 - 10:48
Christopher Hensley, RICP®
In your opinion, what are the first family should take when beginning to plan for caregiving responsibility?

10:51 - 10:54
Isabel MNelgarejo
I think the first step is doing before you need it.

10:54 - 10:54
Christopher Hensley, RICP®
Because.

10:54 - 10:56
Isabel MNelgarejo
You can do it with a neutral.

10:56 - 10:56
Isabel MNelgarejo
Brain.

10:57 - 11:07
Isabel MNelgarejo
You're not going to be affected by the reality and even though it's very hard to go through that process, it is a hypothetical.

11:08 - 11:10
Isabel MNelgarejo
So that's what I recommend.

11:10 - 11:15
Isabel MNelgarejo
Start having these conversations and start having the conversations with your loved ones.

11:16 - 11:23
Isabel MNelgarejo
So a common conversation could be like, hey, where would you like to age in place?

11:26 - 11:27
Isabel MNelgarejo
So that's that.

11:27 - 11:27
Christopher Hensley, RICP®
Question.

11:27 - 11:33
Christopher Hensley, RICP®
Tell us what that means for people who aren't, may not be in our shoes where we're having these conversations.

11:34 - 11:38
Christopher Hensley, RICP®
People, what's the difference between aging in place and other options for people?

11:39 - 11:43
Isabel MNelgarejo
So aging in place means that they are aging where they live.

11:44 - 11:58
Isabel MNelgarejo
And it doesn't necessarily mean that if they are aging in the same house, it just means that they are in their same house or in.

11:58 - 11:59
Christopher Hensley, RICP®
A house.

12:00 - 12:03
Isabel MNelgarejo
And they could even live with a loved.

12:03 - 12:04
Christopher Hensley, RICP®
One.

12:04 - 12:11
Isabel MNelgarejo
And then there is also elder care communities or senior care, memory care.

12:11 - 12:27
Isabel MNelgarejo
So depending on what your loved one needs, like with really advanced dementia, the recommended place would be memory care where you have someone taking care of your loved one 24 seven.

12:27 - 12:32
Isabel MNelgarejo
You can do that at home, it's just gonna be more expensive.

12:32 - 12:39
Isabel MNelgarejo
So that's why it is important to have these conversations to understand what are the wishes.

12:39 - 12:42
Isabel MNelgarejo
And understanding what.

12:42 - 12:52
Isabel MNelgarejo
Are your loved ones wishes, what is like mom wants A, B, C, and D, and I want A, B, C, and D as the caregiver.

12:53 - 12:56
Isabel MNelgarejo
I don't wanna be a 24-7 caregiver.

12:57 - 13:01
Isabel MNelgarejo
I have children, I have to take care of them as well.

13:02 - 13:04
Isabel MNelgarejo
So what are those conditions?

13:04 - 13:08
Isabel MNelgarejo
The average age of a caregiver is 46.

13:08 - 13:25
Isabel MNelgarejo
So, a 46-year-old woman has children at home, maybe they're not babies anymore, but they're still youngish and they need support and they need care and they eat and they're home and they are also taking care of their aging parents.

13:25 - 13:32
Isabel MNelgarejo
So this sandwich generation, what can you do and what are you willing to do and can't do?

13:32 - 13:37
Isabel MNelgarejo
And by having these conversations, you discover what can be done.

13:38 - 13:45
Isabel MNelgarejo
And once you discover what can be done, what are your wishes, you start matching your finances.

13:47 - 13:48
Isabel MNelgarejo
So can we afford this?

13:49 - 13:54
Isabel MNelgarejo
Is there a legal document that support this decision?

13:55 - 13:59
Isabel MNelgarejo
Because that's important as well, so nobody forgets.

13:59 - 14:11
Isabel MNelgarejo
And there is a whole legal system behind that will provide that help and will protect our loved one's wishes.

14:12 - 14:21
Isabel MNelgarejo
So that's really important to have that as well as a whole system that everything, we tick all the boxes and making sure that it's there.

14:23 - 14:24
Christopher Hensley, RICP®
I love it, I love it.

14:24 - 14:34
Christopher Hensley, RICP®
So, you know, this discussion touches a lot of different areas there, you know, with what you just mentioned, these legal documents, the idea of there is a system in place that kind of drives some of that.

14:34 - 14:35
Christopher Hensley, RICP®
Stuff.

14:35 - 14:43
Christopher Hensley, RICP®
We started by saying, you know, you told us to do this before you need to, have these conversations before you need to.

14:43 - 14:50
Christopher Hensley, RICP®
And the legal documents that you ended with, that's very important because some of these things can't go online once the cognitive decline starts kicking in.

14:50 - 14:53
Christopher Hensley, RICP®
So having that conversation is super important.

14:53 - 14:59
Christopher Hensley, RICP®
You gave us an average age of a caregiver of about 46, which I'm shocked I did not realize that I'm 50 and I'm complaining.

14:59 - 15:03
Christopher Hensley, RICP®
And I realized, okay, well, I had some, some wiggle room there in the year.

15:03 - 15:05
Christopher Hensley, RICP®
So okay, that's, that's good to know for sure.

15:06 - 15:19
Christopher Hensley, RICP®
You talked about, you know, also juggling, right, that that sandwich generation, you having your, your generation above you is still having children where tuition, college education, getting the kiddos off to school, all of that stuff's on the line as well.

15:19 - 15:22
Christopher Hensley, RICP®
And then you're having to balance it, right.

15:22 - 15:28
Christopher Hensley, RICP®
And really just the conversation of do they want to in place, and that doesn't necessarily mean their own home.

15:28 - 15:36
Christopher Hensley, RICP®
They could come live with you, but the idea is that there's a separation between that and a skilled medical facility, right?

15:36 - 15:45
Christopher Hensley, RICP®
You gave some examples of senior care, memory care, when there's things like advanced dementia, Alzheimer's, Parkinson's, things where those might come online as well.

15:46 - 15:51
Christopher Hensley, RICP®
Let's pivot and talk a little bit about the program that you've come up with.

15:51 - 15:56
Christopher Hensley, RICP®
How does your program incorporate both emotional and logistical support for caregivers?

15:58 - 16:01
Isabel MNelgarejo
So I work with caregivers in three different levels.

16:01 - 16:06
Isabel MNelgarejo
The first level is understanding where they are and where they want to be.

16:06 - 16:09
Isabel MNelgarejo
What the ambition of that journey.

16:10 - 16:13
Isabel MNelgarejo
As a financial advisor you do exactly the same thing.

16:14 - 16:23
Isabel MNelgarejo
When you start working with a client and in I don't know a year every year you connect with your clients and you talk like okay what's next?

16:24 - 16:26
Isabel MNelgarejo
What do you envision for the future?

16:26 - 16:33
Isabel MNelgarejo
Is this reality still valid and real for you or is there anything we need to change?

16:33 - 16:41
Isabel MNelgarejo
So having that in mind and getting to know and connect and understanding where we want to be and how we want that journey.

16:41 - 16:49
Isabel MNelgarejo
So I help them paint that picture and paint that understanding what are their non-negotiables.

16:50 - 17:01
Isabel MNelgarejo
It's very common that we don't build boundaries around our self-care, so I help them build that vision so they start building those boundaries.

17:02 - 17:11
Isabel MNelgarejo
And as a main key point during this process, I help my clients learn how to have difficult conversations.

17:11 - 17:40
Isabel MNelgarejo
And it's not teaching them because we all know how to have them we know what we need to say but it's changing the mindset that help us break those barriers of having those conversations so making instead of being afraid or being anxious about that conversation how can we change those feelings of some of probably just neutrality and being neutral about this topic so I can talk it.

17:40 - 17:43
Isabel MNelgarejo
So it's helping them with that mindset.

17:43 - 17:48
Isabel MNelgarejo
Then I work with them with a very detailed plan based on what you want or what you want to achieve.

17:49 - 17:51
Isabel MNelgarejo
What are the things that need to happen?

17:51 - 17:54
Isabel MNelgarejo
Do you need to start saving more right now?

17:54 - 18:00
Isabel MNelgarejo
Or maybe do you need to start having visiting places where you can move your parents?

18:00 - 18:12
Isabel MNelgarejo
Or do you need to prove your house or your parents house to assure that you can build rails and change the bathroom so they can age in place.

18:12 - 18:14
Isabel MNelgarejo
Those are the things that you think about.

18:14 - 18:19
Isabel MNelgarejo
I have this specific client who has stairs all over her home.

18:20 - 18:22
Isabel MNelgarejo
She wants to age in place.

18:23 - 18:27
Isabel MNelgarejo
Her current home is not going to be probably that place for her.

18:27 - 18:33
Isabel MNelgarejo
If she starts losing mobility, she will have to move to another home that will accommodate for her.

18:34 - 18:47
Isabel MNelgarejo
So those are the things that we start looking around and before this client falls and she needs to go somewhere else, she knows that she needs to start looking for another place.

18:47 - 18:55
Isabel MNelgarejo
And the third part of the process is building that self-care foundation.

18:57 - 19:01
Isabel MNelgarejo
I don't know if you are into morning or evening routines, I am big on them.

19:02 - 19:14
Isabel MNelgarejo
I love having a very well established morning and evening routines and those support the caregiver so much because that will provide self-care every day.

19:14 - 19:27
Isabel MNelgarejo
So they are having that special moment with themselves to connect, to understand what they want and refill their cups every day.

19:28 - 19:29
Christopher Hensley, RICP®
I love it.

19:29 - 19:29
Christopher Hensley, RICP®
I love it.

19:29 - 19:32
Christopher Hensley, RICP®
So a lot of good stuff that you just mentioned there.

19:32 - 19:42
Christopher Hensley, RICP®
I mean, the idea of having neutrality or objectivity, these are really, really emotionally charged topics that we're talking about.

19:42 - 19:52
Christopher Hensley, RICP®
And so the value of having somebody step in and kind of see it from a bigger picture is really important for them then to go in and make those decisions, right?

19:52 - 19:56
Christopher Hensley, RICP®
So I see that that's super important there.

19:56 - 20:09
Christopher Hensley, RICP®
We've got just about eight minutes before the show's over, and I wanted to ask you about the podcast as well, because all of this work that you've been doing is such a great thing that you're doing right now.

20:09 - 20:14
Christopher Hensley, RICP®
What inspired you to start your podcast, and what do you hope listeners take away.

20:14 - 20:14
Isabel MNelgarejo
From it?

20:15 - 20:31
Isabel MNelgarejo
So I mostly talk about self-care in the podcast, and even when I bring experts in other subjects, I try to bring it in, how can you find self-care with this information?

20:31 - 20:37
Isabel MNelgarejo
And it can be financial self-care because if you're worried about money, then you're worried all the time.

20:37 - 20:40
Isabel MNelgarejo
And ask me how I know that right now.

20:40 - 20:42
Christopher Hensley, RICP®
How do you know that right now?

20:43 - 20:52
Isabel MNelgarejo
With $3 ,000 being paid for doggy care plus another like 1500 in my car today.

20:53 - 20:54
Christopher Hensley, RICP®
Holy smokes, holy smokes.

20:54 - 20:55
Christopher Hensley, RICP®
Yes.

20:55 - 20:59
Isabel MNelgarejo
So yeah, it's been an expensive month.

21:00 - 21:01
Christopher Hensley, RICP®
Yes.

21:01 - 21:04
Christopher Hensley, RICP®
Pets are, you know, there are family members but they are never cheap every.

21:04 - 21:05
Isabel MNelgarejo
Time.

21:05 - 21:08
Christopher Hensley, RICP®
You go to the vet that runs the bill up for sure for sure.

21:09 - 21:09
Isabel MNelgarejo
Yeah.

21:11 - 21:14
Isabel MNelgarejo
So what was the question?

21:14 - 21:15
Isabel MNelgarejo
Oh, the podcast.

21:15 - 21:16
Christopher Hensley, RICP®
Yes.

21:16 - 21:16
Christopher Hensley, RICP®
Yes.

21:16 - 21:22
Isabel MNelgarejo
So I talk a lot about self-care and how can you achieve it?

21:22 - 21:29
Isabel MNelgarejo
How are those, how can you give, gift yourself 10 minutes of self-care every day?

21:29 - 21:38
Isabel MNelgarejo
I've had people come and talk about a home organization for example and how you can keep your home organized with just 10 minutes a day.

21:38 - 21:51
Isabel MNelgarejo
And I think for family caregivers and juggling so many responsibilities that is very useful because we all have 10 minutes to you, okay, I have this in minutes that I'm gonna give myself every day.

21:52 - 22:03
Isabel MNelgarejo
So that is all about how you can provide for yourself, mental well-being or physical well-being or pleasure, anything.

22:04 - 22:05
Christopher Hensley, RICP®
I love it, I love it.

22:05 - 22:13
Christopher Hensley, RICP®
The idea of, you know, self-care is huge for caregivers because often they're not putting themselves ahead and if you don't, you will burn out, right?

22:14 - 22:29
Christopher Hensley, RICP®
You won't have the bandwidth to take care of your other family members, your loved ones, you talked about routines, you talked about home organization, all of these are things to kind of disrupt the caregiver burnout, right?

22:29 - 22:34
Christopher Hensley, RICP®
Or compassion fatigue, which is something you see in medical or healthcare workers, right?

22:34 - 22:35
Christopher Hensley, RICP®
It is a very real thing.

22:36 - 22:38
Christopher Hensley, RICP®
I love it, I love it.

22:38 - 22:39
Christopher Hensley, RICP®
Lots of really, really good stuff here.

22:40 - 22:49
Christopher Hensley, RICP®
Let me ask you about what you think, from a broader perspective, What societal changes do you think are needed to better support family caregivers?

22:51 - 22:55
Isabel MNelgarejo
I think we need to start the conversation.

22:56 - 23:02
Isabel MNelgarejo
If you talk with anybody in the diversity, equity, and inclusion space, they will say that.

23:02 - 23:04
Isabel MNelgarejo
We don't know what we don't know.

23:04 - 23:11
Isabel MNelgarejo
So if we have never been caregivers, if we have never been in that situation, we don't know what it is.

23:12 - 23:19
Isabel MNelgarejo
The good thing about this topic is that we are all subjected to care.

23:19 - 23:23
Isabel MNelgarejo
We are either becoming a caregiver or we will eventually need care.

23:25 - 23:27
Isabel MNelgarejo
We are all in this journey.

23:27 - 23:32
Isabel MNelgarejo
It doesn't matter race, gender, political views, nothing.

23:33 - 23:34
Isabel MNelgarejo
We are all in this together.

23:35 - 24:14
Isabel MNelgarejo
So just opening the conversation and being brave enough to say it out loud and sharing it with everybody and it's just making it aware and if you're in these positions like it depends where your passions are but if you're a very political person maybe you can write a letter to your representative like hey this is going on this is a real issue we are all affected by this reality how can we change regulations to protect caregivers If you are very active at work and you're part of committees or something else.

24:14 - 24:20
Isabel MNelgarejo
You can bring these subjects ahead and tell everybody like, hey, we're in this together.

24:20 - 24:25
Isabel MNelgarejo
How can we support caregivers so they don't quit their jobs down the line?

24:26 - 24:31
Isabel MNelgarejo
If you are a stay-at-home mom, you can also be talking about these things.

24:31 - 24:35
Isabel MNelgarejo
How can you prepare for this time in your life?

24:36 - 24:47
Isabel MNelgarejo
And especially if you are expected to be that person and that point of contact, you can start having these conversations and preparing, talking with your loved ones.

24:47 - 24:50
Isabel MNelgarejo
How can I support you the best?

24:52 - 24:53
Christopher Hensley, RICP®
I love it, I love it.

24:53 - 24:59
Christopher Hensley, RICP®
So this is, you're very correct that we are all in this together, right?

24:59 - 25:08
Christopher Hensley, RICP®
So this is one of those things, I think generational communication has something to do with it as well, Cause it never, it doesn't quite come online until you see it, right?

25:08 - 25:08
Christopher Hensley, RICP®
A lot.

25:08 - 25:09
Isabel MNelgarejo
Of.

25:09 - 25:10
Christopher Hensley, RICP®
Life triggering events.

25:10 - 25:12
Christopher Hensley, RICP®
I mean, in my business, I find that that's very true.

25:12 - 25:25
Christopher Hensley, RICP®
It's hard to get people motivated to do things like estate planning until they have somebody near them that passes, or if they see how much it costs to put somebody into a nursing facility, right?

25:25 - 25:26
Christopher Hensley, RICP®
And then it's like, Oh, okay.

25:26 - 25:29
Christopher Hensley, RICP®
So that that's kind of a trigger for them to do that.

25:29 - 25:31
Christopher Hensley, RICP®
But you also gave us some hope here.

25:31 - 25:43
Christopher Hensley, RICP®
You said, you know, if you're somebody who's active, you can write your, your politicians locally and let them know that this is something that needs to be discussed and advocated for.

25:44 - 25:58
Christopher Hensley, RICP®
Even if you're just at work and you're sharing and talking, letting people know that this is a thing and that we're all in that situation together, I think we will be surprised the kind of dialogue that that will bring with coworkers, right?

25:58 - 25:59
Christopher Hensley, RICP®
Because it's everybody.

26:00 - 26:06
Christopher Hensley, RICP®
I've got clients that are millionaires and some of the craziest thing is it doesn't matter how much money you have.

26:06 - 26:09
Christopher Hensley, RICP®
Once mobility issues kick online, goodbye to.

26:09 - 26:10
Isabel MNelgarejo
The.

26:10 - 26:10
Christopher Hensley, RICP®
Bucket list.

26:12 - 26:15
Christopher Hensley, RICP®
You're tied to the house or you're tied to certain areas.

26:15 - 26:21
Christopher Hensley, RICP®
So there's things that when life catches up that are very common experiences with us across our lives, right?

26:21 - 26:23
Christopher Hensley, RICP®
Well, Isabel, I love it.

26:23 - 26:24
Christopher Hensley, RICP®
We're right here at the end of the show.

26:24 - 26:28
Christopher Hensley, RICP®
What have I forgot to ask you that you'd like to share with listeners today?

26:29 - 26:31
Isabel MNelgarejo
I think you covered everything.

26:32 - 26:35
Isabel MNelgarejo
I really enjoy the the conversation, the fast pace.

26:35 - 26:40
Isabel MNelgarejo
And I know this is like always talking with you is fantastic, the time flies.

26:41 - 26:42
Christopher Hensley, RICP®
Well, I love it, I love it.

26:42 - 26:51
Christopher Hensley, RICP®
And Isabel, for listeners who want to find out more about you, about the podcast, about how to get started in your program, how can they do that?

26:51 - 26:54
Christopher Hensley, RICP®
What would be, where would they go and how would they get in touch with.

26:54 - 26:54
Isabel MNelgarejo
You?

26:54 - 26:57
Isabel MNelgarejo
They can go to my LinkedIn account.

26:57 - 26:58
Isabel MNelgarejo
I'm very active there.

26:58 - 27:00
Isabel MNelgarejo
So Isabel, I'll get at home.

27:00 - 27:04
Isabel MNelgarejo
Now, I can share the links with you.

27:05 - 27:06
Isabel MNelgarejo
I think that would be easiest.

27:07 - 27:15
Isabel MNelgarejo
They can find me on LinkedIn, they can find me on my website, atumcoeur.com, cool in French for heart.

27:16 - 27:18
Christopher Hensley, RICP®
You might need to spell that one out.

27:18 - 27:18
Christopher Hensley, RICP®
Not everybody.

27:19 - 27:21
Christopher Hensley, RICP®
What is the website again?

27:24 - 27:26
Isabel MNelgarejo
It's tumcoeur.com.

27:26 - 27:35
Isabel MNelgarejo
And then we have, they can also find me on my podcast every week on a Time to Care, the Caregivers podcast.

27:36 - 27:37
Christopher Hensley, RICP®
Got it.

27:37 - 27:37
Christopher Hensley, RICP®
Love it.

27:37 - 27:40
Christopher Hensley, RICP®
And if you're driving right now, you don't have to write it down.

27:40 - 27:42
Christopher Hensley, RICP®
We're going to have all of this in the podcast notes as well.

27:42 - 27:43
Christopher Hensley, RICP®
Thank you, Isabelle.

27:43 - 27:45
Christopher Hensley, RICP®
Have a great rest of the afternoon.

27:46 - 27:48
Isabel MNelgarejo
Thank you so much for having me over.