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June 27, 2023

Money Matters 291- Who You Are is How You Lead W/ Rachel L. Rider

Business leaders rise to the top by excelling at doing the work—completing tasks, producing deliverables, meeting deadlines—but once they’re in charge, they must pivot to focus on interpersonal relationships. And, as master coach and founder of...

Business leaders rise to the top by excelling at doing the work—completing tasks, producing deliverables, meeting deadlines—but once they’re in charge, they must pivot to focus on interpersonal relationships. And, as master coach and founder of MettaWorks Rachel Rider explains in WHO YOU ARE IS HOW YOU LEAD (Muse Literary; Spring 2023), the first relationship any leader must work on is the one they have with themself. In this insight-packed, psychology-infused book, Rider shares how she’s helped hundreds of business leaders at companies like GitHub and Okta become high-functioning and self-optimized by identifying and rewiring unhelpful patterns of behavior and training them to prioritize relationship-building. She reveals her in-demand methodology, which is built on the idea that effectiveness as a leader is a direct reflection of one’s inner life.

Today we visited with Kelly and Rachel Rider to do a deep dive into her new book Who You Are is How You Lead.

ABOUT THE AUTHOR

Rachel Rider founded MettaWorks in 2015 after a distinguished career in HR, receiving executive coaching certification from Columbia University, and extensive training in meditation, Somatic Experiencing, and Polarity Therapy. Starting as HR Business Partner responsible for developing and coaching leaders and teams at Bloomberg, she went on to specialize in leadership coaching at AppNexus (since acquired by AT&T) and Digital Ocean, the third-largest hosting company in the world. She studied under renowned teacher and Zen Mountain Monastery founder John Daido Loori Roshi for 13 years before continuing under his successor, Shugen Arnold Roshi. Rider completed a three-year intensive certification in Somatic Experiencing in 2018, and a 2020 training in Polarity Therapy with the aim of bringing leaders tools to unlock effective, long-lasting change in concert with the body. Since 2020, she’s been working intensively with anti-racism coach Makeda Pennycooke. Rider lives in New York with her husband and two children.

More about Rachel L. Rider: https://mettaworks.io/

More about Houston Money Week visit: www.Houstonmoneyweek.org

http://www.cheatsheet.com/personal-fi…​

Financial Advisor Magazine Articles: http://www.fa-mag.com/news/advisors-s…​

http://www.fa-mag.com/news/on-it-s-80…​

You can also listen to this episode and others by podcast at: http://directory.libsyn.com/shows/vie…​ or www.moneymatterspodcast.com #MoneyMattersHouston​​ #ChristopherHensley​​ #HoustonMoneyWeek

Transcript

Rachel Rider: Money Matters Podcast Interview

June 20, 2023 . 12:54 PM . ID: 367315429

Transcript


00:02 - 00:04
[speaker unknown]

This conference will now be recorded.


00:05 - 00:13
Christopher Hensley, RICP®

Good, morning, you're listening to Money Matters, I'm Chris Hensley, we have a fantastic show lined up for you today.


00:14 - 00:20
Christopher Hensley, RICP®

We have with us the author of the book, Who You Are, is How You Lead Rachele Rider.


00:20 - 00:22
Christopher Hensley, RICP®

Rachel, thank you so much for joining us today.


00:23 - 00:25
Rachel Rider

Thank you so much for having me, Chris.


00:25 - 00:31
Christopher Hensley, RICP®

Absolutely, and I'm going to share a little bit about you with listeners who might not be familiar with your work.


00:31 - 00:48
Christopher Hensley, RICP®

Rachel found meta, works in 20 15, after a distinguished career in HR, were singing executive coaching certification from Columbia University, And then the book that we're talking about today, who you are, is how you lead the way that it's described.


00:49 - 00:56
Christopher Hensley, RICP®

In the book, you explain the first relationship, any leader must work on is the only one they have with themselves.


00:56 - 01:15
Christopher Hensley, RICP®

And this insight Packed psychology and fused book writer shares how she's helped hundreds of business leaders at companies like git Hub and to become high functioning and self optimized by identifying and rewiring unhelpful patterns of behavior and training them to prioritize relationship building.


01:15 - 01:16
Christopher Hensley, RICP®

Boom, OK, that's a mouthful.


01:16 - 01:19
Christopher Hensley, RICP®

So, that's all, I'll stop right there.


01:19 - 01:22
Christopher Hensley, RICP®

Again, welcome to the show it.


01:22 - 01:28
Christopher Hensley, RICP®

And is there anything about yourself that you'd like to share with the listeners, maybe outside of the bio, so that we can get to know you a little bit better?


01:29 - 01:29
Rachel Rider

Sure.


01:29 - 01:37
Rachel Rider

I'm an executive coach, I run a coaching firm, and we work with fairly high power, the leaders.


01:37 - 01:51
Rachel Rider

And they're usually at the height of their careers, and they are struggling to enjoy their success, or trust the teams that they've built, or no, just managing the day-to-day issues of where they are.


01:51 - 02:01
Rachel Rider

The thing that really distinguishes us from the industry is that we really pay attention to the whole mind, body, and spirit in the work, which actually creates the true change.


02:01 - 02:08
Rachel Rider

And so that's what the book is starting to talk about, which is, how do you look at the whole picture, and that whole picture starts with you.


02:10 - 02:14
Christopher Hensley, RICP®

And in when you, when you wrote this book, What was the main?


02:14 - 02:16
Christopher Hensley, RICP®

Why did you sit down and write this book?


02:17 - 02:18
Rachel Rider

It's a great question.


02:18 - 02:23
Rachel Rider

I ask myself that too, because as I was writing it, I was post-partum.


02:23 - 02:26
Rachel Rider

I would say two weeks with my second son, we were moving, and I was thinking.


02:27 - 02:27
Christopher Hensley, RICP®

What.


02:27 - 02:40
Rachel Rider

Was important to me about this, because it actually felt like it came from within, And the coaching I do is a very privileged resource, and it is very private.


02:40 - 02:48
Rachel Rider

I work with very high powered leaders behind Closed doors, because it's uncomfortable for leaders to be able to ask for help Publicly.


02:48 - 02:57
Rachel Rider

And so I thought it was really vital to be able to share the work we were doing, and make it as accessible to those who might not be behind closed doors with me.


02:57 - 03:09
Rachel Rider

And so that's what this book really does is it pulls a curtain behind these conversations and provides tools that you can start as a reader to really start delving in yourself.


03:09 - 03:14
Rachel Rider

If you are not sure if you want to work with a coach yet or you're not sure where to begin.


03:15 - 03:16
Christopher Hensley, RICP®

I love it, I love it.


03:16 - 03:18
Christopher Hensley, RICP®

That's a good answer.


03:18 - 03:23
Christopher Hensley, RICP®

As far as especially with the writing process there, that's if it felt like it came from within.


03:23 - 03:36
Christopher Hensley, RICP®

That's a great Place, one of those books that need to be written there, and there's you know there's tons of leadership books out there traditional executive coaches, *** things like what's important to you?


03:36 - 03:37
Christopher Hensley, RICP®

What are your top goals?


03:38 - 03:39
Christopher Hensley, RICP®

What are the roadblocks?


03:39 - 03:46
Christopher Hensley, RICP®

How does the method you describe and who you are is how you lead differ from those approaches?


03:47 - 03:47
Rachel Rider

Such a great question.


03:47 - 03:55
Rachel Rider

I appreciate that because we really do distinguish ourselves in the industry, in the way we bring in the body's nervous system.


03:56 - 04:03
Rachel Rider

I'm trained as a somatic experiencing practitioner, which is a three year intensive training, actually, for trauma.


04:03 - 04:15
Rachel Rider

I don't work with folks in trauma, but the same rules apply when navigating the nervous system when something in your brain is telling you, I don't want to be doing this anymore and yet you keep doing it.


04:15 - 04:19
Rachel Rider

That's a great sign that it is held in your viscera.


04:19 - 04:22
Rachel Rider

It's this habitual behavior on their neurological level.


04:23 - 04:32
Rachel Rider

And so, what we do is, we work at the neurological level, and so, that's what this book starts to talk about, is how do you access that, how do you tap into that?


04:33 - 04:37
Rachel Rider

And so, yes, we care about your big picture goals.


04:37 - 04:40
Rachel Rider

Yes, we care, We want to see a change in behavior.


04:41 - 04:52
Rachel Rider

However, our premise is that your change in behavior will happen when we help you work, at the body level, and we bring in the mind and then, of course, there's the spirit piece.


04:52 - 05:00
Rachel Rider

And so, when all those three are aligned, that's when the power of change is real and you can step into actually who you want to be.


05:02 - 05:03
Christopher Hensley, RICP®

Love it, I love it.


05:03 - 05:08
Christopher Hensley, RICP®

That's definitely a different approach than than what you hear quite a bit and say, we have to outsource our trauma.


05:08 - 05:18
Christopher Hensley, RICP®

But having having that into as an approach for leadership, or starting with kind of the executive coaching, I think it's a good way to come about it.


05:18 - 05:20
Christopher Hensley, RICP®

How about once?


05:20 - 05:26
Christopher Hensley, RICP®

Once one gets into a leadership position, executing task is no longer a key part of the job.


05:26 - 05:29
Christopher Hensley, RICP®

Interpersonal skills become much more central.


05:29 - 05:34
Christopher Hensley, RICP®

Why does excelling in relationships require one to first look with them?


05:35 - 05:36
Rachel Rider

Mmm hmm.


05:37 - 05:42
Rachel Rider

So let me just be, create a clear reason why first.


05:42 - 05:47
Rachel Rider

But executing at that level is not what's needed.


05:47 - 05:56
Rachel Rider

When you are at this most senior level of leadership, You are so far removed from the day-to-day tasks, that it's vital you trust, or people to do it.


05:56 - 05:58
Rachel Rider

And you are not doing it yourself.


05:58 - 06:01
Rachel Rider

When you do it yourself you become the bottleneck.


06:01 - 06:02
Rachel Rider

You also create confusion.


06:02 - 06:03
Rachel Rider

You disempower the people.


06:03 - 06:05
Rachel Rider

You've hired for you.


06:05 - 06:14
Rachel Rider

There's a number of reasons why we need to pull out of the weeds, but you can't pull out of the weeds if you don't trust the people who are working for you.


06:14 - 06:21
Rachel Rider

If you don't have a strong rapport, if you don't trust that, they're going to feel comfortable coming to you when mistakes are made or issues arise.


06:21 - 06:34
Rachel Rider

And so, really, your new deliverable as a leader, becomes your relationship with that person, because the better your relationship with that person, the more effective they are going to be at their role, which is what you really need.


06:34 - 06:42
Rachel Rider

And so then, what that means is you need to be fluent in who you are, have an understanding of what drives you.


06:42 - 06:44
Rachel Rider

When do you get in your own way?


06:45 - 06:50
Rachel Rider

The clearer you are on your own internal landscape, E, the better.


06:50 - 06:59
Rachel Rider

You are able to manage how you show up with others to regulate yourself, when you're in the room, with someone you're feeling frustrated by.


07:00 - 07:04
Rachel Rider

Because when you show up effectively, other people want to work with you.


07:06 - 07:20
Rachel Rider

You can think of it as, oh, it's manipulative to get what I need from people, But I would actually say, when there's a deeper connection, and not, someone's, not being manipulated, but someone truly feels excited to work with.


07:20 - 07:21
Rachel Rider

You feels deeply loyal.


07:21 - 07:24
Rachel Rider

Oh, my God, that's an asset on your team.


07:25 - 07:26
Christopher Hensley, RICP®

I love it.


07:26 - 07:26
Christopher Hensley, RICP®

I love it.


07:26 - 07:40
Christopher Hensley, RICP®

You know, I think we've all worked in the past for some boss or leader, who, you know, has hired you for a role, but then didn't give you the trust to be, you know, to actually empower you to do what you were hired to do.


07:40 - 08:00
Christopher Hensley, RICP®

So, you know, you talked about Really that that relationship, that trust, and I imagine, you know, well, knowing what drives you First, before being able to do that that is a different You know, different perspective than that.


08:00 - 08:02
Christopher Hensley, RICP®

That person that we're just describing, right?


08:04 - 08:06
Christopher Hensley, RICP®

Work, is where your demons go to high.


08:06 - 08:09
Christopher Hensley, RICP®

This is one of the things that you said in the book here.


08:09 - 08:12
Christopher Hensley, RICP®

This is an unusual thing to hear from an executive coach.


08:12 - 08:14
Christopher Hensley, RICP®

Can you explain what you mean?


08:15 - 08:27
Rachel Rider

Yeah, yeah, you know, I feel like there's been really clear narrative around why therapy so important why it's so helpful to speak to someone when you're encountering some issues in your life.


08:29 - 08:32
Rachel Rider

Very rarely do people talk about that.


08:32 - 08:37
Rachel Rider

When you show up in a certain way in the workplace you can be alienating others.


08:37 - 08:48
Rachel Rider

You can be detrimental, detrimental to your own success because of how you're communicating because of the way you manage your anger, because of your own anxiety.


08:48 - 09:00
Rachel Rider

When you use your voice, very few people are talking about the fact that how you are managing your own inner life and your own inner demons, actually, is really important in how you show up at work.


09:00 - 09:05
Rachel Rider

Now, the reason why your demons go to hide it work is because no one's looking for them at work.


09:05 - 09:13
Rachel Rider

They're doing their, their personal stuff at the therapist's office and so when they come to work, it's like, well, I just gotta show up, get my day down, and come home.


09:13 - 09:17
Rachel Rider

And in fact, actually, that's where the demons really love to stay and sleep.


09:17 - 09:18
Rachel Rider

And hide.


09:18 - 09:19
Rachel Rider

Because they know they're not going to be found.


09:20 - 09:27
Rachel Rider

But if you're doing your work with your therapist, you need to assume that that kind of stuff is infiltrating your work-life.


09:28 - 09:30
Rachel Rider

As an executive coach, I'm not your therapist.


09:30 - 09:41
Rachel Rider

What I'm here to do is help you understand how you're showing up in your inner world and those demons you may have maybe leaking out into impacting your professional experience.


09:42 - 09:47
Rachel Rider

And so that may be, you get really angry and frustrated very easily and you raise your voice.


09:47 - 09:49
Rachel Rider

And that's alienating others.


09:49 - 09:55
Rachel Rider

Or that maybe you have some self confidence issues And so you don't speak up, or you say yes all the time.


09:55 - 09:59
Rachel Rider

And so now, no-one relies on you because you say, Yes, and don't deliver.


10:00 - 10:02
Rachel Rider

Those are that's what I'm talking about when I'm saying demons.


10:02 - 10:06
Rachel Rider

Go to hide, because you're not on the lookout for them and work.


10:07 - 10:08
Christopher Hensley, RICP®

I love it, I love it.


10:08 - 10:17
Christopher Hensley, RICP®

These are all very real issues for people who have, you know, all of us, really, anybody who has relationships at work, right?


10:18 - 10:20
Christopher Hensley, RICP®

You know, you come in from an HR background.


10:21 - 10:25
Christopher Hensley, RICP®

The, the, what you call it, what we call interpersonal skills, are what we call soft skills, right?


10:25 - 10:36
Christopher Hensley, RICP®

Having to have this conversation with the CEO, You know, soft skills, but this is some of the most important thing for people who are really high performers to to be able to do that.


10:36 - 10:44
Christopher Hensley, RICP®

Is it possible to teach business leaders, interpersonal skills, aren't There some people who just don't play well with others?


10:45 - 10:45
Rachel Rider

Hmm?


10:48 - 10:49
Rachel Rider

Are there?


10:52 - 10:56
Rachel Rider

Irene, I love to answer this question in that.


10:56 - 11:10
Rachel Rider

Anyone who wants to change anyone who cares about how they show up and impact others, Ken can change can have a positive impact, especially when they're authentic to themselves.


11:11 - 11:18
Rachel Rider

I really believe that you can have remarkably strong interpersonal relationships at work as long as you care about it.


11:18 - 11:28
Rachel Rider

But if someone doesn't care, there might be some people who just inter personally aren't great, but that's because they don't care, not because they're incapable of it.


11:28 - 11:35
Rachel Rider

And I want to acknowledge that there's an neurological spectrum here.


11:36 - 11:42
Rachel Rider

And I am not an expert on a typical neurologic, all ways of showing up.


11:42 - 11:50
Rachel Rider

And I do believe that even in those circumstances, you can show up well on the workplace and honoring who you are.


11:52 - 11:53
Christopher Hensley, RICP®

Love it.


11:53 - 11:55
Christopher Hensley, RICP®

So just, so one has just, you have to care.


11:56 - 12:01
Christopher Hensley, RICP®

And the people who don't get into that scope, right, the abilities there, then.


12:01 - 12:02
Rachel Rider

In.


12:02 - 12:04
Christopher Hensley, RICP®

Each of us, that ability is there.


12:04 - 12:09
Christopher Hensley, RICP®

Now, you weave your personal and your professional narrative throughout this book.


12:09 - 12:12
Christopher Hensley, RICP®

Including how you juggle your career with being a mom.


12:12 - 12:19
Christopher Hensley, RICP®

How your childhood dynamics played out in your leadership style and how you overcame the physical ailment that you suffer due distress.


12:19 - 12:24
Christopher Hensley, RICP®

Why was that important for you to do?


12:26 - 12:34
Rachel Rider

The book includes, every chapter is a client session, and a client specific story.


12:34 - 12:43
Rachel Rider

And that felt really important, so that folks could understand how to apply the tenants of the book, and how they manifest in the workplace.


12:44 - 12:55
Rachel Rider

With that being said, I thought it was really helpful to add my story, so that it drove home the point that A, these tenants can translate outside of our professional life as well.


12:55 - 12:57
Rachel Rider

And be, allows the reader to understand.


12:57 - 13:12
Rachel Rider

I've practiced these over and over again in my life, and seen a change, and so that the reader really has access to different ways these tenants can show up in your life, and really help and impact you in a different way.


13:12 - 13:22
Rachel Rider

And I think that the story of the client, as well as my own story, become a really beautiful, compelling cocktail of how to play with and experiment with these tools yourself.


13:24 - 13:29
Christopher Hensley, RICP®

I love it, I know when I'm reading a book, if it's just, you know, I'm actually in the process of writing a non-fiction book right now.


13:29 - 13:43
Christopher Hensley, RICP®

And the idea is, if, you know, if your style is where you're just listing out kinda the ideas and that sort of thing, the stories really pull us N, So the fact that you have real life stories and kind of the examples of the clients.


13:43 - 13:49
Christopher Hensley, RICP®

Sessions, people can see that and say, OK, well, here's here's these principles in action, right?


13:49 - 13:50
Christopher Hensley, RICP®

Now.


13:50 - 13:53
Christopher Hensley, RICP®

You've been working with anti racism, coach, for years.


13:54 - 14:00
Christopher Hensley, RICP®

Can you explain what insights you glean from that work Now, that now Inform your coaching.


14:00 - 14:03
Christopher Hensley, RICP®

How does that come, come over to your coaching?


14:03 - 14:11
Rachel Rider

Yeah, we've actually, um, not only do I work with her one-on-one, but we do a twice a year.


14:11 - 14:19
Rachel Rider

We run a team, anti racism workshop, and we just had our second one for the year last week.


14:20 - 14:25
Rachel Rider

So this is really fresh, in terms of the way this integrates into the coaching.


14:26 - 14:40
Rachel Rider

I am a white woman of quite a lot of privilege, and in my anti racism work, it's becoming clear to me that whiteness carries a lot of presumptions, intendant within it.


14:40 - 14:57
Rachel Rider

That if I am not aware of, I am perpetuating my coaching, and that feels really inappropriate for me, because I work with leaders, frankly, across the globe, and across all races, even within the America the United States.


14:58 - 15:03
Rachel Rider

So the idea of not examining my own perpetuation of whiteness feels irresponsible.


15:04 - 15:25
Rachel Rider

And so some of the ways that I've been really examining this within myself and for a team are looking at things like perfectionism, and expectations of urgency, and, um, there's a tenant in, in the whiteness pillar, that's unspoken often.


15:25 - 15:27
Rachel Rider

Which is a right to comfort as a white person.


15:27 - 15:33
Rachel Rider

I have the right to be comfortable in any circumstance even when we're having a difficult conversation.


15:34 - 15:45
Rachel Rider

One of the things I've been looking at in terms of my own coaching is that for years, I've been working with leaders to help them speak in difficult conversations and put their people at ease.


15:46 - 15:54
Rachel Rider

With the presumption that everyone should be comfortable even in a difficult conversation, that's a great example of me perpetuating a whiteness idea.


15:54 - 15:58
Rachel Rider

That may be, isn't necessarily true and doesn't have to be.


15:59 - 16:14
Rachel Rider

And so an example of this anti racism work within myself and within our firm is to really continue to look at how am I, how have I internalized whiteness within myself and then perpetuating it within my coaching?


16:14 - 16:19
Rachel Rider

And I would say, I don't think there's a, you pass the test or a mountain top to complete.


16:19 - 16:28
Rachel Rider

I think this is a lifetime of work, but work that's really important to me in being a phenomenal coach, and also helping to change the world a little.


16:29 - 16:30
Christopher Hensley, RICP®

I love it.


16:30 - 16:31
Christopher Hensley, RICP®

I love it.


16:31 - 16:35
Christopher Hensley, RICP®

I know it's been 20 years since I've been in the corporate workplace.


16:35 - 16:44
Christopher Hensley, RICP®

So, so, so, but even being able to have a conversation like this with companies is super important.


16:45 - 16:49
Christopher Hensley, RICP®

Whether it's gender, whether it's race, what about age?


16:49 - 16:56
Christopher Hensley, RICP®

Do you find that, oh, maybe older generations have a hard time understanding some of this?


16:56 - 16:59
Christopher Hensley, RICP®

Is there any correlation there between generation or age?


17:04 - 17:07
Rachel Rider

I don't want to make any generally.


17:08 - 17:08
Christopher Hensley, RICP®

Generalizations.


17:08 - 17:09
Christopher Hensley, RICP®

I'd.


17:10 - 17:17
Rachel Rider

Say from my own experience is, um, we try to mostly work with folks who are interested in looking at themselves.


17:18 - 17:20
Rachel Rider

And that doesn't matter the age or race.


17:21 - 17:26
Rachel Rider

And when, when a leader comes to us, the presumption is they're here to examine themselves.


17:27 - 17:35
Rachel Rider

And so, whatever preconceptions they come with, the assumption is that we are here to help them examine and explore them and maybe challenge them.


17:36 - 17:53
Rachel Rider

And so, I think that whoever we're working with, well, whatever preconceptions they come with, there's the presumption that we're going to try to look at them and see what really holds true for them, what honors their authentic self, and what's simply perpetuating social conditioning that may not be so helpful?


17:55 - 17:55
Christopher Hensley, RICP®

I love it.


17:55 - 17:59
Christopher Hensley, RICP®

Well, just the idea of even having those conversations, I'm dating myself.


17:59 - 18:05
Christopher Hensley, RICP®

But, you know, 20 years back, it would be very hard to even approach some of those top.


18:05 - 18:05
Christopher Hensley, RICP®

Yeah.


18:05 - 18:05
Rachel Rider

So.


18:05 - 18:11
Christopher Hensley, RICP®

Just people raising their hand and saying, OK, I want to have those conversations, is definitely sound.


18:11 - 18:15
Christopher Hensley, RICP®

And if that's integrated in this, that, that's a, that's fantastic, really.


18:16 - 18:33
Christopher Hensley, RICP®

Now, you're very clear to note, that you're not a psychologist, and we would kinda over, there's some overlap here, but, or a therapist, but rather, a high level executive coach, but your approach does lean heavily into personal growth, emotional baggage, and lifelong patterns of behavior.


18:34 - 18:38
Christopher Hensley, RICP®

Can you explain where that line is drawn, and how you avoid crossing?


18:38 - 18:39
Rachel Rider

Yeah.


18:40 - 18:46
Rachel Rider

Yeah, I think that this can get confusing for for folks, especially when we're doing deep work and executive coaching.


18:46 - 18:50
Rachel Rider

I'm very clear that I am not a trauma specialist.


18:50 - 19:00
Rachel Rider

I may have been trained in how to navigate that so I know how to tell them when it's arising and that's when I'll say, Let's make sure that you're talking to someone about this.


19:00 - 19:16
Rachel Rider

And so a specific example that I can tell you is you know, I was working with a client recently who got was really activated and agitated by someone on their team who worked for them and it was confusing for him because he was like I'm in charge why.


19:16 - 19:17
Rachel Rider

Why is this.


19:17 - 19:20
Rachel Rider

So disruptive to me.


19:20 - 19:23
Rachel Rider

And through our work and our sessions together ...


19:24 - 19:30
Rachel Rider

Uncovered that oh this this employee reminds me of my father it stirs old stuff up.


19:30 - 19:34
Rachel Rider

And so in that moment we made sure that he could bring that twist therapists.


19:34 - 19:39
Rachel Rider

What about what is really still unfinished about his father that needs attending to?


19:40 - 19:51
Rachel Rider

So that that piece about examining his relationship with his father goes to his therapist, what our role is to help him understand how the person working for him is not his father.


19:51 - 20:00
Rachel Rider

And so I'm working with the professional context, so that he can take his personal context, trauma, an examination, of that with his therapist.


20:00 - 20:01
Rachel Rider

And I'll tell you.


20:01 - 20:09
Rachel Rider

I love working with someone who has a therapist working with someone who has a spiritual teacher, because that becomes such a powerful combination.


20:09 - 20:15
Rachel Rider

It means that they're approaching the struggles on every I side of the spectrum.


20:15 - 20:16
Rachel Rider

And so that real change can happen.


20:16 - 20:19
Rachel Rider

So I'm really supportive of having a therapist as well.


20:21 - 20:34
Christopher Hensley, RICP®

I love that a lot of the things that you touched upon the trauma is that, say, I just got, finished reading a book by Peter ..., which is mostly physical, health and Living to be 100.


20:34 - 20:41
Christopher Hensley, RICP®

But, the very end of the book, he brings back, know, the most important, is getting past those trauma.


20:41 - 20:44
Christopher Hensley, RICP®

Does trauma that, you know, working on yourself, So it's when you hear these things.


20:44 - 20:48
Christopher Hensley, RICP®

And multiple, it's just kinda neat when stuff kinda syncs up like that.


20:48 - 20:53
Christopher Hensley, RICP®

The book, who you are, is how you lead, the author, Rachel, Ryder.


20:53 - 20:58
Christopher Hensley, RICP®

Rachel, what have I forgot to ask you, that you'd like to leave our listeners with today?


21:00 - 21:10
Rachel Rider

That knowing the inner landscape of ourselves is a lifetime of work, and that it can be fun, and that just doing a little, has a huge impact.


21:10 - 21:11
Rachel Rider

And so check out the book.


21:11 - 21:16
Rachel Rider

Take a look and see what what you might be able to do today to really shift the course of something in your life.


21:18 - 21:24
Christopher Hensley, RICP®

I love it, and we're right here at the end of the show for listeners who'd like to find out more about you.


21:24 - 21:26
Christopher Hensley, RICP®

What is the best place for them to go?


21:27 - 21:31
Rachel Rider

My firm is called Motto: Works ME, T T W O R K S.


21:31 - 21:37
Rachel Rider

So, you can check us out at matter works, dot I O M, E T T W O R K S Die.


21:40 - 21:41
Christopher Hensley, RICP®

Perfect.


21:41 - 21:43
Christopher Hensley, RICP®

Rachel, thank you so much for being on the show today.


21:43 - 21:44
Rachel Rider

Thank you.


21:45 - 21:45
Rachel Rider

Youtube.

Rachel Rider Profile Photo

Rachel Rider

Founder and CEO of Mettaworks

Rachel is a Columbia University certified executive coach with over a decade of coaching experience. She sets her practice apart by drawing from both traditional and alternative modalities, including Somatic Experiencing, Polarity Therapy, Zen Buddhism, Inner Relationship Focusing, and antiracism. Her aim is to see, hear, and feel a client’s needs with utmost clarity in order to bring about profound, lasting, and measurable results.

Rachel also draws from firsthand in-house leadership experience, first as Bloomberg’s HR Business Partner responsible for developing and coaching leaders and teams, and then in charge of leadership coaching at AppNexus (since acquired by AT&T) and Digital Ocean, the third-largest hosting company in the world.

It was in these roles that she began to develop the modalities that underpin the MettaWorks method. And it was one instance in particular that motivated her to launch her own coaching practice. Early in her career, she was in charge of laying off 60 long time colleagues – face to face. Deeply conflicted, she did the only thing she could think to do: she went inward, and attended to her own sense of conflict, and made space for the task at hand, which she carried out with empathy, and attention.

The results were clear, and so was the path forward. After earning her executive coaching certification through Columbia University, Rachel founded MettaWorks in 2015.

Since then, she has completed a three-year intensive certification in Somatic Experiencing.She has also received training in Polarity Thera… Read More